We Secretly Replaced the World’s Democracies with Folger’s Crystal Coffee

13 01 2008

And no one noticed the difference!

Citizens the world round are delighted by Folgers Crystals instant coffee in place of the usual, slow-brewed democracy. In polls people prefer it 20 to one.

Here’s a few responses from customers who were pleasantly surprised:

“I can’t believe this is instant coffee!  I would have sweared this was the usual constitutional three-branch representative democracy that I always enjoy after a big meal.”

“This is Folger’s Crystals?  I’m switching right away.  I can’t believe I’ve been making messy, time-consuming government by and for the people all this time!  I could have just added hot water!”

“Did you say this was Folgers? Amazing.  Before tonight, I wouldn’t have touched instant coffee, but now that you’ve tricked me into it, well. I can say, only a fool would brew whole-bean representation when they could save themselves all that effort with instant.”

“Delicious.  I know a few non-democracies that would be interested in this stuff — it’s that good!”

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