Earth to Dr. Phil: On What Planet is Your Library?

27 06 2007

Okay, I normally wouldn’t watch Dr. Phil unless I felt almost suicidal, but last night I was at the laundromat and natural curiosity caused me to look at what problem the pretty young lady on his show could possibly be having.  The sound was down, so I had to read the closed caption, and Dr. Phil was like: You have got to change your lifestyle, girl, because you can’t handle drugs and alcohol — but that isn’t to say YOU HAVE TO BECOME A LIBRARIAN.”

Excuse me?  What did Dr. Phil just say about librarians?  That they can’t handle their booze and dope????  Hello, Earth to Dr. Phil, I’m not really sure on what planet where you go to the library, but I assure you that librarians are plenty good at handling recreational mood enhancements, unlike that poor young lightweight on your show.  Give her a few years, and she’ll be handling her booze much more professionally herself.

Now here’s a few things, Dr. Phil, that I’m sure many librarians and library workers would want you to know about them.  They ARE NOT: 

1. Saints 2. Goody-two-shoes and/or 3. Lightweights with their likker and drugz.

Okay, Dr. Phil, I hope you can get that straight in the future.  Library workers don’t appreciate everyone thinking that we are all so damn good all the time.  We aren’t that good, I promise you.  Some of us even turn in our books WEEKS late and have been caught saying “libary” instead of “library.”  Yes, we bad.




One response

13 07 2007
Dr. Phil

actually, it’s liberry…

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